Setting Sail for Fail: Why A Cruise Isn’t A Long-Term Care Facility

Let’s be honest: nobody grows up dreaming of retiring to a nursing home. You don’t hear many people say, “One day, I hope I get a semi-private room with a view of the parking lot.”

The truth, though, is that if you’re lucky enough to live into your 60s or 70s, there’s a good chance you’ll need some kind of long-term care. Regardless if you need help with everyday things like bathing, dressing, or managing medications, or even something much more substantial, there is a good chance you will need long-term care. According to the Department of Health and Human Services, about 70% of people who reach age 65 will need some form of long-term care during their lifetime.

That’s a hard truth, and a lot of people try to sidestep it. I see it all the time. People insist they’ll “just move in with the kids,” or they imagine quietly fading away without ever needing help, or they assume they’ll hire “someone” to take care of them when the time comes.

Lately, I’ve been seeing a new twist on this denial pop up on the Jarvis Law Office Facebook page. Whenever we post about the cost of nursing homes, often $10,000 to $14,000 per month here in Ohio, someone jumps into the comments and says:

“I’ll just live on a cruise ship instead.”

The first time, I laughed. I love Sandra Bullock, and this comment made me think of that amazingly bad film. But when that same comment started appearing week after week, it stopped being funny and started to worry me. People genuinely seem to think this is a plan.

I’m here to tell you: it’s not. And after talking with families about long-term care every week at Jarvis Law Office, I can tell you exactly why this “retire on a cruise ship” idea will leave you shipwrecked.

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“But There’s a Doctor on Board!” – Medical Care on a Cruise Ship

One of the first arguments people make is, “Cruise ships have medical staff. I’ll be fine.”

They’re not wrong that there’s a doctor on board. Cruise lines do have medical personnel, and they have equipment designed for emergencies. If you fall and break a bone, or you spike a fever, they can help stabilize you. But don’t be fooled by TV, Doctor Odyssey isn’t going to be your attending physician.

But here’s the key:
They are not there to act as your primary care doctor. They are not specialists in long-term care. Their job is to keep you safe until you can get to a real medical facility on land.

If it’s a serious issue, you’re not settling in for long-term treatment in a cozy on-board clinic. You’re being sent off the ship — sometimes via helicopter — to a hospital or facility that’s equipped to handle your condition.

A few other realities people don’t think about:

• Cruise cabins are not built for care needs. They’re designed for vacations, not walkers, wheelchairs, hospital beds, or medical equipment. Most rooms are smaller than what you’d see in an assisted living facility.
• Chronic conditions need ongoing care. If you’ve been diagnosed with something like cancer, Parkinson’s disease, or heart failure, you’ll likely need regular visits with specialists, tests, and follow-up appointments. The doctor on a ship simply isn’t set up to manage that kind of ongoing care.
• Foreign ports add complexity. If something serious happens while you’re docked in another country, you may find yourself in a local clinic or hospital — not exactly a comforting thought if you’re used to your own doctors and health system.

Simply put, cruise ship medicine is geared toward “patch you up and send you home,” not “keep you safe and supported for months or years.”

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The Cost Myth: That “Cheap Cruise” Isn’t What You Think

I’ll be the first to admit that assisted living and nursing homes are not cheap. In Ohio, nursing homes can easily run upward of $14,000 per month in 2025. That’s a heavy number.

So when people see a “4-day cruise for $189,” it’s easy to think, Why would I pay for a nursing home when I can sip piña coladas at sea for less?

But let’s look a little closer.

Those enticing offers:

• Are usually short trips, not year-round living arrangements
• Don’t include all the extra costs: taxes, port fees, tips, excursions, drinks, and upgrades
• Are priced for vacationers, not residents

There are specialty cruise lines that offer residential-style living. You can buy a unit and essentially live onboard as your “home.” But here’s where reality hits harder than a rogue wave:

• One residential ship I researched had a minimum buy-in of over $1,000,000 just to purchase the room.
• On top of that, there were annual fees in the hundreds of thousands of dollars.

That makes even a pricey nursing home look like a bargain.

Some people push back and say, “I’ll just hop on and off different cruises.” Think about that for a second. Do you really want to drag your life — luggage, medications, paperwork, sentimental items — on and off a ship every week or two? You also can’t simply stay on the boat between sailings; when one cruise ends, everyone gets off.

It’s not “cheap, simple living.” It’s expensive, complicated, and unstable.

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Dementia and Cruise Ships: A Truly Dangerous Mix

Generally, when folks need assisted care, they’re not in perfect health. That’s especially true when someone has been diagnosed with a memory issue like dementia or Alzheimer’s.

There are few places on earth that are worse for a person with dementia than a cruise ship.

Cruise ships are:

• Large, confusing, and full of identical hallways
• Constantly moving and changing — new ports, new people, new sounds and sights
• Crowded with strangers, noise, and activity

For someone with dementia, that’s a recipe for disorientation and distress.

Imagine:

• A person with dementia stepping out of their cabin and not remembering which way to turn
• Getting off the ship at a port like Mexico or the Bahamas and not being able to find their way back
• Struggling to communicate in a place where they don’t speak the language or understand local systems

And unlike a memory care unit in an assisted living community, cruise ships are not designed around safety for people with cognitive impairment. They’re designed for fun and freedom, not supervision and structured support.

The risk of a person becoming lost, injured, or ending up in a dangerous situation goes way up — and help might not reach them in time.

If you have a loved one with memory issues, a cruise vacation carefully supervised by family might be a nice experience for a short period of time. But turning a ship into their long-term “home” is not safe, realistic, or fair to them.

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Overall Safety: Great for Vacations, Not for Your Address

We’ve talked about medical issues, costs, and memory care. Now let’s zoom out.

Cruise ships can be a blast. I’m not anti-cruise. But they’re built around leisure and entertainment, not as a long-term housing and care solution.

A few big-picture things to keep in mind:

• Health crises happen. We don’t have to think too hard to remember this. During the COVID-19 pandemic, some ships were stuck at sea for days before docking, and the entire industry shut down for months. If your “home” is a ship when something like that happens, you’re not just inconvenienced — you’re effectively homeless until someone sorts it out.
• You don’t control the rules. Cruise ships that operate out of the United States are often registered in other countries. There are business reasons for this, but it can also mean very different rules and oversight if something goes wrong. That’s not what you want when you’re depending on a place for care.
• There’s no built-in care team for daily needs. Assisted living and nursing homes have staff whose primary role is to help with bathing, dressing, medication management, meals, and supervision. Cruise staff are there to bring you food and drinks, run activities, and keep the ship running — not to provide long-term personal care.

A cruise ship is a fantastic place to visit. It is not a stable, safe, or dependable place to rely on when you can no longer care for yourself.

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A Better Plan: Take the Cruise, Then Plan for Care

We’ve only scratched the surface of why a cruise ship is a fun vacation and a terrible long-term care strategy. The good news is, there are better options.

With the right planning, you can:

• Protect your savings from being wiped out by nursing home costs
• Explore legal tools and benefits that may help pay for care
• Make your wishes clear, so your family isn’t left guessing and scrambling
• Create a plan that lets you live with as much independence, comfort, and dignity as possible

At Jarvis Law Office, we help families every day who are facing decisions about long-term care — sometimes in a crisis, and sometimes (the ones who sleep better at night) before there’s a crisis.

Here’s what I recommend:

• Use your healthy years to take the cruise while you can enjoy it.
• Use those same healthy years to put an estate and care plan in place so you’re not forced into desperate options later.

Start by scheduling a FREE consultation with our firm. We’ll walk you through your options, answer your questions, and help you chart a course that keeps you safe, supported, and protected — no balcony cabin required.

We’d love for you to embark on your next journey with us.

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